The Best 5 Pickup Lines That Howard Wolowitz Ever Said On TBBT


Before Bernadette came along, Howard Wolowitz was definitely the biggest creep on the show. Whether he’s trying out a new eye patch, putting the moves on Penny, or using a lame pickup line, we can’t help but love the hopeless romantic.

“Baby You Turn My Floppy Disk… Into A Hard Drive”

The Big Bang Theory | Photo Credit CBS

Originally, Howard Wolowtiz would always say that Penny was fair game. This led to him getting his eye patch popped on his face and even getting slugged in the face in his bedroom when he made a move.

Surprisingly, Bernadette was the one to change all of this.

”Your Bosons… They Give Me A Hadron”

The Big Bang Theory | Photo Credit CBS

Most of Howard’s pickup lines are so iconic because they only apply to her nerdy-sense of humor. It’s not enough that he’s got a ridiculous belt buckle and rainbow outfit, but he’s shouting obscene science pickup lines in bars.

”I Wish I Was Your Differential Equation Homework…

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“…Because then I’d be really hard and you’d be doing me on your desk,” said Howard Wolowitz. In another failed attempt, our “hero” did his best to take home a beautiful girl in a bar.

The one time his line almost worked was when he was in charge of the Mars Rover. Ironically, Leonard ended up getting with this girl.

”Hey Girl, Do You Love Water…?”

The Big Bang Theory | Photo Credit CBS

“…That means you love 80 percent of me,” he said in another lame attempt. When he got the girl to come back to the lab, he accidentally got the Mars Rover stuck. He called Leonard for backup and the girl liked Leonard more than Howard.

”You Must Be The Square Root Of Two…

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“…Because I feel irrational around you.” After Leonard took Howard’s girl, our fearless pickup artist got mad at his friend. But, in the end, she told Howard she had a friend that he might like, so things worked out for the best.

Perhaps Howard Wolowitz is a better wingman than a leader. Every time he ever went out with Raj Koothrappali, it seemed like the two would fail miserably. Luckily, Howard doesn’t have to worry about this anymore.

What is your favorite Howard Wolowtiz crash-and-burn pick-up line?