We really enjoyed having our brood of nine. Someone once asked us why we have so many children. Without missing a beat, my husband quipped,
“We just found something we were good at and decided to stick with it.”
For me, it wasn’t as easy with Grandkids.
At first, I chalked it up to the fact that my girls were just good mothers. Their babies didn’t need another mom. Like me, they all nursed their babies. So all of our grandkids were very attached to their mothers.
One of the biggest stumbling blocks for me was the fact that when the grandkids started coming, I still had a house full of children. Seven to be exact.
When our first grandson was born, I still had a toddler in the house.
That kept me very much in full mom mode. Don’t get me wrong, the grandkids loved coming to our house. As far as they were concerned, there was always a party going on over at grandma’s house. For the longest time, I was designated the “grandma with all the kids.”
But my daughter noticed there was a difference between me and her mother-in-law. Their other grandma couldn’t wait for them to get there. She would plan her entire day around the grandkids coming.
I just swept them into the crowd. They got a swat on the behind if they needed it, just like everyone else. There wasn’t even any junk food in the house to spoil them with.
The difference was, her house had been void of children for many, many years.
Come to think of it, you could say, that they stepped right back into their mom or dad’s childhood home. It was still one-hundred percent a mom’s house. Not a grandma house.
Looking back, I remember my daughter being more than a little upset about it. It didn’t seem fair– I just wasn’t the wrap-em-in-kisses kinda grandma she thought I should be.
There is a big difference between being a mom, and being a grandma. It’s far better than the old joke, “you can spoil them all day and send them home at night.” I never liked that phrase. I guess, it was because it sounded like you get all of the fun, but you don’t have to do any of the work.
That’s not true.
Having grandkids is better than having your own children.
But not because it’s easier. It’s because you can see the beauty of childhood without the weight of parenthood. The brevity of childhood is as crisp and real as a summer flower. You’ve seen the breadth of it, and it slipped through your fingers without warning.
That’s why having grandkids is better than having your own kids, you can enjoy the immense wonder of just what a miracle they truly are. That’s a gift that only age can give.